My Aura is Yellow

The following is a list of things, in no particular order, that are currently contributing to my anxious state of existence: spiders Spiders are so important for our environment to function but... like... stay in your lane. I don't go outside, you don't come inside. Please. My grandpa always told me spiders are more scared of me than I am of them, but I don't know about that anymore, Grandpa. There are more spiders on Earth than there are people. They could be lurking, preparing for world domination. We don't know.  also snakes THEY HAVE SHARP TEETH. WHERE ARE THEIR BONES. NO THANKS. the apocalypse When the apocalypse happens, I won't be able to get conditioner so my hair won't be soft. Also I won't be able to get my heart medication and there will be no painkillers so I will die and be able to feel every second of it!!   college + a career??? The future is terrifying and I am too young to be sure of what I want to do and where I want to

Every day, I wake next to a pile of empty Mountain Dew bottles and cans. I head to the kitchen, down my heart meds with a sip of Dew, and grab a bottle for the road. When I get to school, I squish the now empty bottle into my locker, the slight disturbance causing empty bottles to fall to the floor. I gently toss them back on top and smile at my growing collection. At lunch, I get a chai latte from Einstein's to get me through the afternoon. When I get home, another bottle of Mountain Dew preps me to do my homework. During StudProd tech week, my house ran out of Mountain Dew, and I didn't have 10 minutes to run to Walmart and buy more. I was ill. I cried. I raged. I yelled onstage, backstage, on the elevator, and in the car ride home. My cast members told me I had a problem. My mom informed me that she was going to take steps to cut the caffeine dependency out of me. So I went to Cracked in the mornings to buy my Mountain Dew. Mom couldn't stop me if she couldn't see

Dear heathens, For some unholy reason, there is currently no creamy peanut butter in my house. We have crunchy, and we have extra crunchy. To anyone and everyone who has participated in the crunchy peanut butter consumption that made my family think this was acceptable, I blame you. You will not be forgiven for this. And we need to talk. What are you doing? Why do you do this to yourselves? Peanut butter should not have a notable texture past sticky. I don't care what kind of bread you use. I don't care what kind of jelly. I don't care if you skip the bread and jelly altogether and eat your peanut butter out of the jar with a spoon. Doesn't matter to me. Let's just look at peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for a moment, though. The standard recipe is two slices of bread, one spread with peanut butter and one spread with jelly. What we  don't do is attempt to slather CRUNCHY peanut butter all over the sandwich and completely destroy the integrity of